TivoBlogging: The Following Takes Place Between 08:00 AM and 10:00 AM

In case you were busy watching the Golden Globes and don’t want to watch it on Hulu, our own VthK has provided the following recap of hours 1 and 2.  

08:00:00 to 08:16:57

OK, it’s been a while since I’ve done one of these things, so my memory may be a little fuzzy. Anyway, as we start on Day 7 of Die Hard II 2… um, I mean, 24… and the very first line is “Put that phone away.” Which is ironic because, IIRC, people spend more time talking on phones in ’24′ than the night shift at Bangalore Customer Support, Inc.

So, anyway, there’s this guy who played a nerdy scientist on Stargate SG-1, and he’s driving his daughter to school when he gets caught in the middle of an Allstate product placement. Except instead of Dennis Haysbert telling him he’s in good hands, he gets captured by terrorists. The terrorist have this device that enables them to take over everything in the USA. But they recently upgraded to Vista and it’s no longer compatible. They need Stargate Scientist Guy to make it work.

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Meanwhile, the main character… the blond guy with the anger management problem … gosh what is his name? I can’t remember but heplayed Ace Merrill in Stand By Me. Anyway, Ace Merrill is getting ragged on by Senator Red Foreman. We also learned CTU has been disbanded. It’s been a while, but I seem to recall CTU was some kind of rhythm and blues band. Anyway, Red Foreman, wants to know why Ace Merill tortured some guy, and Ace says that it was to save a busload of schoolchildren and kittens. “Think of the kittens!” Ace thunders at Red Foreman, then threatens to torture the smug look off his ass-face.

Then, Ace gets pulled out of the meeting by an FBI agent who, like Red Foreman, is a redhead but way more attractive. Ace promises to come back the next morning… i.e. 24 hours later. So, he really has a time limit this time. The redheaded agent is identified as Renee “Street” walker.  Streetwalker isn’t actually that hot, but next to Janeane Garofalo and President Cankles, she looks like Melissa Theriau.

Then I got confused because the scene switched to the FBI and at first I thought the ugly Stargate Scientist guy was talking to a sarcastic android. Then I realized it wasn’t the stargate scientist again, it was Janeane Garofalo. A bunch of other sub-plots were also introduced. President Cankles got her some jungle fever, and wants to invade Africa. Some bald guy who was either the VP or her husband is obsessing over the death of his son. Some douche of an FBI agent was strongly disapproving of Ace’s methods.

08:21:24 to 08:45:00

So, anyway, Streetwalker tells Ace Merrill that domestic terrorists have a device that will allow them to take over all infrastructure and wreak havoc on the government to teach them a lesson for dragging their feet on HDTV implementation. The leader of the terrorists is an old friend of Ace’s. Ace doesn’t believe it. “Tony’s dead. I saw it.” Streetwalker rolls her eyes. “You have to destroy the brain.”

Anyway, so Stargate Scientist Guy tells them to do a ctrl-alt-del and install new drivers, and now the device works fine. So, Zombie Tony is gonna go all Die Hard II on air traffic control, and the scene cuts away to a full 767 getting ready to take-off with some cute androgynous munchkin in the front row.

Meanwhile, President Cankles is watching reports of 200,000 people killed in Africa and regrets ever subscribing to The Genocide Channel. The Joint Chiefs are on-board with the invasion, but the Secretary of State… another bald dude… is wetting his pants submissively. That’s like three annoying bald dudes so far… Red Foreman, the SecState, and SubPlot Guy. Anyway, the FAA — showing far more competence than any other Federal Agency in history — has detected the intrusion into its system and wants to ground flights. But Cankles says not yet, she has to short sell her airline stocks first.

So, anyway, Ace is working with the sarcastic android to see if they can track down Zombie Tony. Then, Streetwalker gets attacked by a mutant rottweiler… no, wait, that’s Janeane Garofalo talking about some chick stuff I guess. I don’t know. Then, Agent Douchebag tells Streetwalker to keep Ace on a short leash. “OK, if he’s into that,” she replies.

Anyway, the Sarcastic Android has helped Ace find one of his and Zombie Tony’s old contacts, named Sphincter, who not only happens to deal in Technology That Let’s You Take Over The World, but has also relocated from LA LA to DC. As the Church Lady would say, “How CONVENIENT!”

8:49:51 to 08:59:59

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So, Ace and Streetwalker go to Sphincter’s office. Sphincter refuses to cooperate until Ace grabs a ballpoint pen and threatens to write “I Am Sphincter Boy” on Sphincter’s forehead. But before he can spill his guts, Sphincter gets shot by a sniper in the abdomen and starts spilling his guts, although not in a useful way. And the hour ends with Ace and Streetwalker chasing after the sniper.

09:00:00 to 09:10:52

So, Streetwalker and Bruce Willis — I mean Ace Merrill — are trying to catch the sniper and they got him trapped in a building. Streetwalker calls for back-up. Ace figures there must be a mole at the FBI, and he begins teaching his young padawan how to use the Force… the Force of completely distrusting all of your co-workers. I mean, Emperor Palpatine did have a mole at the Jedi Temple. I wonder if this means we’ll get a scene of Sarcastic Android slaughtering the younglings. I am pretty sure his character fantasizes about that. 

Anyway, then there’s a scene in which a rotting, putrifying moose carcass … no, wait, that’s Janeane Garofalo … reports to Agent Douchebag that the terrorists are now fully inside the system and there’s nothing the FBI can do to stop them.

Anyway, Zombie Tony has put the plane with the cute youngling on board (and probably a cargo hold full of orphaned kittens) on a collision course with another plane. But at the last minute, he wusses out and deprives the audience of much-needed carnage.

09:16:32 to 09:28:38

So, anyway, Streetwalker makes Ace wait in the car while she and the other agents seal off the building the sniper is hiding in. She cracks the window for him and leaves him a squeaky toy. A Magic Negro appears and absolves Ace Merrill of his sins. Then, Ace asks about Agent Streetwalker. “Oh, yeah, baby, she understands what it takes to get the job done IYKWIMAITTYD.” And just in case Ace doesn’t, the Magic Negro mimes the sound of a porn movie bass guitar.

 So, Zombie Tony passes off the Plot Device and the ugly scientist to a guy who looks like what would happen if a transporter accident merged Pierce Brosnan and John Kerry into one squinty, French-looking being with Rod Blagojevich hair. He turns out to be working with the Genocidal dictator of that African country President Cankles is all hot to invade. I’m almost sure the transporter accident guy played a system lord on SG-1. (For that matter, I also think President Cankles played the president on Space: Above and Beyond … but looking that up would also mean admitting I watched Space: Above and Beyond.) OK, checked his website, no SG-1 reference, but he did play an immortal on Highlander. Anyway, President Cankles meets with the other African guy who is the opposition leader against the genocidal dictator, but for some reason talks like Father Guido Sarducci. Why couldn’t they just have hired Mr. Eko from Lost? 

So, anyway, another annoying bald guy (This makes Number 4) shows up and helps the sniper escape from the building the FBI has “sealed off.” There’s also this other FBI guy who has a buzzcut and is always advising the president of this or that, but I only mention him to bookmark him as a Mole candidate.

 09:31:22 to 09:42:40

 So, Ace gets out of the car to “get some air.” And just as he does, the Sniper in the borrowed FBI vest walks by. (“How CONVENIENT!”) Ace notices his shoes are not standard FBI issue, but instead appear to be Stride-Rite pumps. He alerts Streetwalker and convinces her to leave the building and discreetly follow the assassin, but not to tell the FBI because “they’ll just screw things up.”

The FBI lead, agent Douchebag, finds out they’ve left the scene, and asks the turd-creature from “Weird Science” — no, wait, that’s Janeane Garofalo again — to figure out a way to track Agent Streetwalker and Ace.

 And then, in that other subplot, Annoying Bald Guy Number 2 roughs up some fairly-hot chick who kind of looks like Gretchen from ‘Prison Break’ after six months of Slim Fast, and she just got $400,000 wired into an off-shore account, but still works in telemarketing. He was gonna go all Ike Turner on her, but his driver intervened. I’m sure they’ll be back, but the show’s already about two subplots past my attention span.

 09:48:38 to 09:59:59

 So, Ace and Streetwalker follow the Sniper to the docks (which Streetwalker has worked many a time). Streetwalker gives Ace a gun. They beat the crap out of the sniper then shoot out a surveillance camera. As they walk up to the boat they think Zombie Tony is in, the sniper gets shot (ironically) by the crew of Tony’s board (Isaac, Doc, and Gopher.) So, Ace and Streetwalker shoot-up the boat. Streetwalker finds a laptop, but it’s deleting all the files on its hard drive.

Gawdam Vista. 

And Ace is trying to find Zombie Tony, but ZT pulls the old “Hide behind the pilot house door” trick and hits Ace in the face. Then, they beat the crap out of each other for the remaining few minutes of the program until Agent Douchebag shows up in a helicopter.

Tick-Tock

Kim’s Back (we promise)

No this is not another April Fool’s Day prank.

Just when you think 24 could not possible sink further into the depths of redunkulousness, Entertainment Weekly is reporting that Kim Bauer will return, joining Zombie Tony and Jack “Into Africa” Bauer.

“Sources confirm to me exclusively that Cuthbert has inked a deal to reprise her role as Jack’s lightning rod of an offspring for a season-ending arc that will no doubt trigger a new round of wholly outdated and painfully unfunny cougar jokes,” said EW’s Michael Ausiello in his Ask Auseillo column.

It also goes on to say that she will be appearing without her old boyfriend, originally played by C. Thomas Howell, but with a child of her own.

Do the writer’s of 24 really think that Jack would let Kim Bauer have children?  Does he not put up with enough crap in his day job?

Kim Bauer’s Kid Jokes

How do you get Kim Bauer’s kid out of a tree?
-Wave at him/her

Jack Bauer went over to visit his grandchild and saw it staring at the carton of orange juice. So he asks why they are staring at the carton of OJ. “Because it says ‘concentrate’ on it” says Little Bauer.

How do you know Kim’s child is related to Jack Bauer?
-It burned down the school to get out of 3rd grade.

How did Jack Bauer know that Kim’s kid was at his desk?
-There was whiteout on the computer screen.

Kim Bauer and her child were in Orlando and saw a sign that said “Disney Left”.  So they went home.

When Kim’s baby was born, she looked down at the umbilical cord and said, “Wow, it comes with cable too!”

Did you hear about the time that Kim bought little Bauer a package of M&M’s?
-She returned them because they were all W’s

Why don’t Kim and her child don’t watch 60 Minutes?
-Because they don’t have 2 hours to spare.

A little something for the ladies

Here’s a little eye candy for the ladies. Tony Almeida and Jack Bauer sitting together signing autographs for the nerds at Comic-Con in San Diego.

Jack leaves town and a 5.8 earthquake hits. I’m not saying he’s responsible, but it seems like Jack Bauer is as good for California as clubs are to baby seals. The fact is that the last time Jack Bauer went to California a nuke went off.  Now and earthquake.

Forget Africa Jack, head to Iran.

Chloe scoopage!

So, at least a year and a half will have gone by between the end of Season 6 (a.k.a. the Crapapalooza) and the start of Season 7.

How’d I figure that out? Well, Mary Lynn Rajskub, our beloved (in a broad sense of that word) Chloe, told TVGuide.com the following:

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I show up, time has passed and I have a 1-year-old and a wedding ring, [and I'm] calling Morris (Carlo Rota) while I’m busy. So far he’s taking care of the baby, but he’ll be around.

Now, I’ve been pregnant before, and trust me, you find out you’re pregnant well before three months are up. But I’m willing to give her the benefit of the doubt. She has a busy job. Maybe she didn’t notice. So she was at most 3 months preggers when last we saw the lovely Russet Potato Face. That leaves 6 months of pregnancy, plus a year for the baby’s age, and presto change-o, you have a year and a half.

Now that we’ve established that I am at the very least competent in basic mathematics, I have this to say:

Morris is back? Ug. I’d have said Ugh, but he’s not worth the “h” at the end. That’s really freakin’ annoying, I have to say. I was kinda hoping to see Chloe wearing a Baby Bjorn and her little girl hacking into national security computers between naps and no Morris anywhere to be seen. I’m sure Carlo Rota is a perfectly nice man and actor, but I really hated Morris. OK, I didn’t hate him, but he sure as heck annoyed me.

Rajskub also put fans’ minds at ease: We weren’t the only ones stunned to find out Tony Almeida (Carlos Bernard) was returning.

I was pretty shocked that they brought [Bernard] back. It’s more about the shocking people that are living rather than the shocking deaths this year.

Now, what does that mean? Will dear, departed Edgar return from the great beyond? Maybe everyone Jack’s killed who worked for CTU will come back as zombies.

By the by, check out Remote Access for the first official pix of Jack from Season 7 (scroll down to the bottom).

24 – Season 7 trailer

YouTube Preview Image

The TV premiere of the 24 – Season 7 trailer is on Fox tonight during the 7th inning of the World Series. Not to spoil it, but the Red Sox will be up 11 – 2 with home runs from Manny, Big Papi, and possibly even JD Drew. Ok, so maybe not Drew.

You can also go to Times Square around 1pm today and watch it in the rain. Or you can just watch the trailer now.

Jack Bauer brings torture back, check.
There’s a shooter on the roof, check!
Mole in the FBI, check.
Tony’s back, check.
Tony’s a bad guy who wants to crash airplanes. What?

I have an issue with Tony’s new favorite hobby, crashing airliners. John McClane called, he wants the Die Hard 2 plot back. If they are going to steal a Die Hard plot, at least steal from one of the good ones. Someone get me Samuel L. Jackson and some snarky German terrorists for Jack Bauer to take down while performing asinine tasks and riddles?

Hot Agent: Do whatever it takes, torture him if you have to.
Bauer: I’m going to enjoy this.

So, what do you think? I remember the explosive Season 6 trailer looked pretty cool as well.

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24: Season 1, episodes 5-7

24_logo_season5s.jpg Note: As promised, I’ve begun watching Season 1 of 24 and am blogging on one episode a week episodes after I see them, as a run-up to Season 7. Remember, I’m pretending I know nothing about Seasons 2-6, so blah blah blah, yackety schmackety.

I know, I’ve been very remiss in blogging on Season 1. Life’s been busy.

But this weekend, as all the sick people in my house napped, I watched episodes 5, 6 and 7 in a row and am back in the action.

And action it was!

I’ll deal with this character group by character group:

First up: The Palmers.

OK, what is up with this family? They make the Clinton and Bush families seem normal. The entire family knows that little Palmer accidentally killed the man who raped his sister and that family hatchet man “Carl” helped them cover it up and no one thought Papa Palmer should know?

Of course, if he had known, this storyline wouldn’t be nearly so dramatic, but still. I think he needs to rethink his relationship with his family. His son obviously has major father issues; his daughter obviously doesn’t want to do anything to harm daddy; and Sherry, well, I appear to have been wrong about her.

24-cast-season1.jpg

Sherry seems to have a very conniving side to her. I’m guessing we’ll see more of that as time wears on. The true character of many characters here seems to be coming out only now.

The big Q: Will all Palmers be by David’s side for the early morning breakfast? We shall see.

Next up: Kim and Terri Bauer

Kim has flashes of not being an idiot, but just can’t sustain them.

Now that her remaining kidnapper (in these three episodes, the meaner — and less attractive, how fortunate! — of the two kidnappers is shot point blank in the head by Gaines) is on her side (he has been sweet on her from the beginning) is on her side, she has the chance to get outta there.

While I understand that she doesn’t feel like she can leave her mom, she would have a much better chance of getting Teri free, it seems, if she escaped with kidnap boy and got to her dad, telling him where Teri was.

As for Teri, how shocked was she to realize the guy she thought she was with was actually dead? And what a blow to Jack to find that out. He’s totally screwed. I can’t even fathom how he’s going to get out of this one.

Then we have: Jack Bauer & CTU

I’m not sure how the bad guys have managed to hook into every single camera everywhere. In the hospital, in CTU, etc. OK, I understand CTU, given that there’s a spy there, but in the hospital? How’d they work that out?

It seems obvious that Gaines & Co. are going to try to either have Jack kill Palmer himself or at least be framed for his death. Can’t imagine why else Gaines would be having Jack head over to the breakfast.

Of course, we’re not all that far into the 24-hour cycle, so I’m not sure how that’s going to work. We have a lot of day ahead of us. Dennis Haysbert is listed as a star, not a guest star, so I can only think he’s not going to die. At least, not so early in the day.

As for CTU, it seems that George Mason has come to recognize that Jack is not a total rogue and actually knows a bit of what he’s doing. I’m glad he finally trusted Jack a bit. I think that Mason isn’t as bad a guy as he’s appeared to be up until this point — perhaps the bad things he did were for a reason; Jack’s done some iffy things already that we’ve accepted because we know he has a good reason.

Totally stunned when Jack shot Nina, and even more so when Tony discovered Jack had given Nina a flak jacket and she got up and walked away from her would-be grave. Talk about a dramatic moment when he shot her. I was on the edge of my seat!

He obviously wanted to shoot her in the back because there’d be less of a chance of him missing the jacket and hitting her; in the front, the jacket could have slipped open and he could have actually shot her for real.

But what about Jamie? She obviously is the spy. Teri calls, gets her, asks for help escaping her kidnapper and Jamie sends the bad guys to get her. Wow. She’s one of the only people Jack actually did trust in CTU. Makes it a little more clear as to why she didn’t want Milo working on that key card (what an annoying person he was! But Eric Balfour, the actor, looked better than he did when he was on Six Feet Under and had a shaved head.).

Wonder who’s going to figure out she’s on the wrong side. My money’s on Tony. He’s kind of a jerk, but he does seem to have his head on straight and seems to want to actually do his job and do it well. And actor Carlos Bernard has finally stopped that weird “voice” he was using, a half-whisper that just sounded like he had a cold.

I think that wraps it up.

In all, an excellent three-episode arc. Plenty of drama and payoff. Can’t believe the fake Alan York killed Janet after all she’d been through to survive. The Nina killing was utterly dramatic and fabulous. The show’s definitely picking up steam.


The Who’s Who of 24 Villains – Ramon Salazar

Blogs4Bauer has ranked the hottest women of 24, now we’re looking at the people (and/or animals) we love to see Jack Bauer hate on. We rank em, Jack breaks ‘em and now we continue our listing of the Top 10 – 24 Villains of all time.

Ramon Salazar

Name: Ramon Salazar
Season: Three
Occupation: Drug Kingpin
First seen:
1:00pm – Day 3
Last Seen:
1:00am – Day 3
Status:
Dead

Despite what you may think, Ramon Salazar isn’t a side dish at trendy Spanish restaurants. Ramon Salazar isn’t the Hispanic guy on Desperate Housewives. Ramon Salazar isn’t the guy we removed from power in Panama many years ago. Finally, Ramon Salazar is was not Phil Hartman.

hartman

No, Ramon Salazar was your standard run-of-the mill drug kingpin who ended up playing Russian Roulette with Jack Bauer after the CTU agent breaks INTO a prison, a riot breaks out, and the two are forced to play Russian Roulette after Bauer breaks into a prison (oops, I was stuck in a 24 plot loop).

Ramon was in jail when Season 3 starts. Hell shouldn’t I be writing this profile about his brother, Hector Salazar? I would be writing this about Hector, if it wasn’t for Ramon shooting his own brother…and the aforementioned Russian Roulette game which prompted Fox to have Jack Bauer film a PSA on gun safety. Hint: Kids, it’s dangerous to load a gun and point it at your forehead while pulling the trigger, unless your name is Jack Bauer.

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So why are we here? Oh, yeah, Ramon and his brother were going to release the infamous Cordilla virus. No, the Cordilla isn’t a soft taco wrapped with a hard outer shell with 2 meats and a cheesy core at Taco Bell for $1.99. The virus was made in The Ukraine and imported to LA. It causes nose-bleeds, bad breath, hemorrhaging, skin abscesses and eventually death. Michelle Dessler was infected, but having slept with Tony Almeida, she was immune to the ill effects of the virus.

So Jack’s undercover, in Mexico, surrounded by drug dealers. So basically…a typical Wednesday night for Kiefer Sutherland. Jack was tested by the Salazars who asked Bauer to shoot his partner, Chase Edmunds. Jack pulls the trigger – click – the gun was empty (we all know that he has no problems with thinning CTU’s payroll on his own). Hector was convinced, so Ramon shot and killed him.

The virus was put up for sale on Ebay and Nina Myers won with a last minute bid to beat out Ramon (also known as kidFunKY223). And here’s where it get’s weird.

Nina gets kidnapped and is forced to turn over a vial containing the virus. Ramon then pulls a gun on Jack and Chase Edmunds shoots Ramon with a sniper rifle. Then Delta company swoops in (late), Jack kills a few dudes with a knife, something explodes, and Ramon escapes. Later (aka 1 commercial break) Jack corners Ramon and tells him “it’s over”. Wait, he actually said “IT’S OVER”. Ramon threatens to unleash the virus; instead the vial explodes – killing Ramon. He fell for the exploding Cordilla virus trick! Jack Bauer will later use this same trick with an exploding memory stick.

Ramon Salazar: (after sparing Jack’s life) The man has more lives than a cat.

In our Villain matrix, Ramon scores pretty high on Meanness for killing his brother. He also scores well for Coolness because of his cool name. However, he didn’t last long so his Reign of Terror is low.

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Final Rankings (out of 10)
Meanness: 8
Coolness: 6
Reign of Terror: 2
Sexiness: 5
Total Points: 21

Point/Counterpoint

050.jpgPoint: Can I come back, please?
by: Agent Lynn McGill

I read on Blogs4Bauer that Tony Almeida is coming back for Season 7 and I think that’s really great. Tony was a real swell guy and never got a silent clock. Come to mention it, I never got a silent clock…can I come back for Season 7 as well. Please?

Seriously, I would really like to come back next season and I havebanner2.jpg some great ideas that would really help the writers of the show. Are you listening Manny Coto, you no-talent hack? Jack in Africa? What in the hell were you thinking?

The first thing I’d do is give me a better name, Lynn is a girl’s name and I was always getting teased by the CTU security staff. How does Lance Powers sound? Powers and Bauer, we could be nicknamed Bacardi and Baileys. Watch out bad guys – here comes Powers and Bauer! Sorry Jack, I meant Bauer and Powers.

I would also need an eye patch, a mustache, and a motorcycle. No make that two eye patches. Have I mentioned the midgets? We’d need at least three that would be there to serve us drinks and fetch babes. Then we need a cool black dude who’s only role is to wear aviator sun glasses and say cool things like “damn bro’ that’s gonna leave a mark” and “he did not see that coming“.

Well that’s all that I’ve come up with so far. There’s this one storyline involving an underground dolphin fighting ring, but I’ve yet to hear back from Brett Farve on his availability.

Powers out.

TONYTONYTONYTONYTONYTONY’S BACK

7a_8a_tony.jpgSorry for the all caps, but that’s just about how I feel. Found it out just this morning. Check out the full report here.

Basically, Howard Gordon admits that with no ticking clock to announce Tony’s demise, the door was always open for his return.

Season 7 is not going to be a repeat of the Crapapalooza. We who kept the faith are about to be rewarded. Thoughts, comments?

By the way, has anyone told Tony that Michelle is now a chaplain on ER?

And I’m sorry, I don’t usually squeal like a little girl, but THIS IS FREAKIN’ AWESOME.

NOTE: If you want to see the whole press release, check it out here.

Season 1, episode 2

24_logo_season5s.jpgNote: As promised, I’ve begun watching Season 1 of 24 and am blogging on one episode a week, as a run-up to Season 7. Remember, I’m pretending I know nothing about Seasons 2-6, so no snarky comments about how I’m an idiot because I think Tony’s a jerk or Sherry Palmer’s a stand-up woman. Ahem.

Wow. I honestly have to say I was shocked when Nina Myers’ name came up as the potential mole. I’d suspect Tony before Nina. I mean, why is he so intent on finding out what Jack is doing?

But besides the fact that Nina seems so unlikely as the mole, I find it hard to believe the truth about that would come out in only the second episode. I’m thinking there’s got to be more to this. Unfortunately, the body count is already stacking up and two people died in getting this information into Jack Bauer’s hot little hands. Nice toss by Walsh.
I wonder if someone else (Tony seems a likely suspect, especially considering he’s dating Nina) used Nina’s computer to encode the Palmer info on the keycard to frame her in case the information ever came to light.

24-cast-season1.jpgMeanwhile, we check in on the probable future president or soon-to-be assassinated presidential candidate David Palmer. I like this guy, but really wonder what it is he’s trying to hide. What’s the story that the reporter called him on? Why’d he leave the hotel suite to meet up with this mysterious “Carl”?

Hopefully, Secret Service Agent Aaron Pierce will track him down before any harm comes to Palmer. Pierce had a calming presence.

Mandy and her cohorts had the opposite effect.

What’s up with Mandy’s partner, refusing to hand over the goods? They’ve been paid. It seems to me, though, that bad people shouldn’t double-cross their evil partners. That never seems to work out well.

And this Jonathan is an awfully good shot (shooting an egg off a chain-link fence?!), so it doesn’t seem like it’s a good idea to piss him off too much. That was some pretty fast plastic surgery, though.

Lastly, we have Kim. It’s pretty obvious now that these boys aren’t just in it for a joyride with some drunk girls. While the girls’ virtue may be relatively safe, they’re in an awful lot of danger.

Janet just got at least one arm broken (can’t imagine anything less after being smashed against a car door with a tire iron!) and is totally drugged up. Kim seems to be kinda safe right now as the masterminds “don’t want her injured.”

But who are these “masterminds”? Are they connected to the Palmer assassination or are there two things going on at the same time?

And was there a weird bit of chemistry between Janet’s dad and Teri Bauer? Something strange between them.

Check back next week to see where things go from here.