Blogs.4Bauer

Digital Spy reports that 24 could be moving to NBC from Fox.  This makes my dream of watching a 24-Office mash-up closer to reality.

Jack Bauer spending 24 hours at Dunder Mifflin…oh the possibilities.

At the end of last night’s episode, just before Ernie Anastos previewed what would be on the 10pm news, The Jack Sack helped coin a new word that will become part of 24 lexicon forever.

In honor of his (and Wyatt’s) contribution, I’ve submitted “Wyattastic” to Urban Dictionary where millions of people looking for crude sexual innuendo will instead be taught about Wyatt’s penchant for liveblogging episodes of 24 where even Jack Bauer looks bored.

For example, as TJS stated, last night’s episode was “Wyattastic”.

Submit your own examples of using this new word in the comments.

Update: Urban Dictionary published an entry for Wyattastic.

Punxsutawney Phil, the infamous weather predicting rodent, emerged from his hole on Tuesday and saw Jack Bauer’s shadow signaling at least 18 more weeks of terrorists getting their ass kicked and the end of winter.

Did you miss last night’s episode of 24 because of a prior engagement (Amy)? Well here is the Agent Renee Walker shower scene that you were probably going to go on Hulu to watch anyway.

Even if your name is not Arlo, you’ll probably watch it more than once.

Little Boy Heroically Shoots, Mutilates Burglar

Point: Jack Bauer is a bad influence on his grandchild
By: Grandpa Oscar

I’m a concerned grandparent who has been a fan of the show ‘24′ from the start.  While I have enjoyed the years of senseless violence, I’m starting to wonder if it has negative consequences.  Take little Teri Bauer, Jack’s granddaughter.  I see that they are going to start spending more time together (in around 24 hours or so).  This worries me because of Jack’s history of violence against both terrorists and fellow family members (see Graem and Great Grandpa Bauer).

It should also be clear to Fox that Jack’s history of extreme violence has already impacted how Teri sees the world.  Just check out the picture she drew for Grandpa in episode 2 of this season.

If my grandchild drew a picture of her grandpa blowing the brains out of a cute blue stick figure, alarms would sound and Grandpa would not shoot people around the grand kids ever again.  I speak for most responsible adults when I say that Jack Bauer is not a good influence on Teri Bauer.  On a side note, Teri cannot draw for crap.

I’d also like to complain about this weather and my aching knees, but I have to take my Popular Science into the bathroom and have a bowel movement.  You know, they haven’t been the same since Korea.

Previous Point/Counterpoints

“I want my binky now, dammit”

Previous

I have some good news and some bad news.

First, the bad news.  This will probably the last season for our favorite show, you know….24

Now for the good news.  There will be no Jack Bauer-Audrey Raines hook-up (Jadrey is what we call the relationship in celebrity-hookup terms).

Exec producer Evan Katz tells me that a series-ending story has been hatched should 24 clock out for good next May—and it doesn’t involve an Audrey-Jack reunion.

“Some of the things we’re doing this season preclude [her returning],” he says. “So I think not. She was in bad shape the last time we saw her.” (Source)

That being said, this site has been known to throw around some rumors to see what sticks.  With Audrey still blowing spit bubbles and talking to her carpet, Jack Bauer needs a new love interest.

Why not go Brokeback?  With our inside sources, I can confirm the new relationship for Jack Bauer will be…. “CurBauer”.  Curtis Manning, who I bet you thought was killed when Jack shot him in the neck to save the terrorist Assad.  Nope, Edgar Stiles got a silent clock, however Curtis did not meaning he’s alive and wants Jack, literally.

Curtis: “You hurt me real bad Jack”

Jack: “Dammit Curtis, I had to save Assad.  I had no choice”

Curtis: “We all have choices Jack, I choose you”

The new relationship should secure at least one Grammy, an Emmy and a few Sundance awards.

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According to Robert Knepper (aka – T-bag from Prison Break), he was going to give up acting a number of years ago.  That is until Jack Bauer punched him in his face.

In hindsight, Jack Bauer should have punched the writers of Prison Break for keeping that show around so long.  I mean come on, they broke out of prison in season number 1.  End of show.

1. Kim suddenly regretted her decision to use lighter fluid as a fabric softener.
2. “Ouch, my leg is on fire”
3. Cougar-speak: medium rare
4. Being a blond, Kim was accustomed to burning sensations.  However this time it burned and she wasn’t even peeing.  Strange.
5.  After saving RFTR’s computer from the wreck, all that Kim was able to uncover was that he had an unhealthy obsession with her and unicorns.

Submit your own captions in the comments.

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If Kim Bauer running after a bad guy – who was hiding in the most unsecure baggage claim ever didn’t do it, if Jack Bauer landing a 727 on an LA Freeway didn’t do it, if Jack Bauer touring Africa didn’t do it, then the people behind 24 may have found a way to get you to finally turn off 24.  Freddie Prinze Jr. will join the cast next season.

I will say it again to let it sink in.  

Freddie Prinze Jr. will join the cast next season.  He’ll play Davis Cole who may or may not be upset because his name is actually two last names.

That shriek is either your 13 year old daughter and/or Andrew Sullivan.  

Personally, I’ve been watching 24 since Day 1-Hour 1 so it’d take a lot more to stop me from turning in for the Jack Bauer Power Hour.  However if Adam Lambert joins the cast, I’m out.

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And now a PSA from the management of this website.

I missed last week’s episode of 24 because my wife went into labor. 

I missed the season finale because we had to take my wife to the ER for high blood pressure.  Doctors telling you that your wife is at risk of a stroke is not something even Jack Bauer would be prepared for.  We have her on blood pressure medication now and will monitor her to make sure it goes down.  

You pregnant women out there (and the baby daddies) – check your blood pressure before and after you give birth. 

On a lighter note – thanks to the miracle of DVR, I was able to watch the season finale with my new son.