Blogs.4Bauer

Counterpoint: Breckinridge, You Couldn’t Hold Jack Bauer’s Jock.
by Chloe O’Brian

Agent Breckinridge, I’d like to respond for Jack Bauer. Why? Because he is too busy saving the country to rip someone on a blog. As I write this, Jack is currently tracking the man responsible for a nerve agent attack in Los Angeles. You may know him. His name is President Charles Logan!

David, you brag about finding a mole and saving the President in one hour and thirty-five minutes. Well, golly gee, it took you that long to find one man? Are you an idiot? In the past five or so years, Jack has gone toe-to-toe with a Latin American drug cartel, an elite paratrooper regiment, and an Islamofascist terror network. He almost singlehandedly took them (there were far more than one) all down in twenty-four hours.

You also brag about the Secret Service being mole-free for 141 years. Then you find the first ever (who also happens to be your octogenarian mentor) and it takes you almost two hours to take him down? If the USSS were such an efficient, well-oiled machine, I would have figured that there would be training scenarios for just such an event. I guess I was wrong.

Look, I would just love to stay and chat – really, and I mean that – but I am a very busy person right now. My suggestion would for you to prepare your resume – since the President won’t be in office for much longer – and have a nice, cool glass of shut the hell up. Moron.

Point: Jack Bauer Puts the “Special” in Special Agent
by Agent David Breckinridge

Point: Jack Bauer Puts the “Special” in Special Agent
by Agent David Breckinridge

I’m agent David Breckinridge, and I just had the longest hour and thirty-five minutes of my life.

Working the security detail in Washington DC can be a dangerous job. It takes a real man to defend the President of the United States and look good doing so. That’s why Agent Jack Bauer came to DC and ended up crawling back to LA? Jack Bauer just couldn’t hack it in ‘the district’.

Did you know that in 141 years of the Secret Service, there has never been a mole, until now? As it turns out my mentor happened to be the mole. I had a limited time frame to get to the bottom of the mole business and save the President’s life. I live for this kind of stuff.

Yet, I hear that in only 5 days at CTU, there’s been something like 18 moles. It seems to me Jack Bauer runs a sloppy shop out in “el-lay“. Imagine if the president’s life were in his hands? Someone could get hurt and that’s just not going to happen on my watch.

What I did in 1 hour and 37 minutes would probably take “special” agent Jack Bauer 24 hours. We just don’t have time for Jack Bauer.

Counterpoint: Breckinridge, You Couldn’t Hold Jack Bauer’s Jock.
by Chloe O’Brian

Previous Point-Counterpoint Posts
Point – I’m Going to Kill Jack Bauer! by Christopher Henderson
Counterpoint – Henderson, You’re As Good As Dead! by The Grim Reaper

Point- Jack Bauer Cannot Help Recover Your Money, Mr. Rakotozafy (I can) – by Nina Myers
Counterpoint- Everything Nina Myers says is bullsh*t. – by Jack Bauer

Point- Audrey Raines: Kick The Jack Habit Today! – by Dr. Phil (on loan from Match.com)Counterpoint – Audrey, stand by your man! – by Mary Jo Buttafuoco

Point – Thin Mints are an addictive narcotic – by Jack Bauer
Counterpoint – Thin Mints Are Only The Beginning – by Vladimir Bierko

Point – I’m going to make it! by Random Guard
Counterpoint – Nah, you’re not. – by Death

Point – CTU needs better training for their security guards before something bad happens
Counterpoint – My teenage daughter could have stopped every incursion into CTU!

Point- 24:The Game Will Lead to More Violence
Counterpoint – Violence Makes The World Go ‘Round

Point – Jack Bauer could not have shot down one of our AS 350 Ecureuil Helicopters with a handgun
Counterpoint – A redneck with a squirt gun could shoot down your euro-trash.

Point – It’s Time To Turn Jack Bauer Over To The Chinese
Counterpoint – Confucius Say, “Man With Wandering Groin Accomplishes Little”

Point – Impeach Weasel, Dennis Kucinich For President
Counterpoint – Fox should fight off impeachment like Shelley Winters fought off diet cola

Point – They are already illegally wiretapping Jack Bauer’s cell phone, whose next?
Counterpoint – The U.S. government does not violate our civil rights enough!

“BAD DAD” SECRETARY OF DEFENSE JAMES HELLER

It’s guys like this that gives dads a bad name.

You may recall last year, Heller allowed CTU to “do whatever” it took to make his son tell them what they needed to know. His secret turned out to be that the lad was bi-sexual (a sure sign of Bad Dad Syndrome).

Then this year, to keep Audrey from…whatever, he tells his bodyguards to “restrain” his daughter. So there she is, manacled to a post in a storeroom on the orders of dear old dad.

Somehow, I don’t think Heller is going to have much of a Father’s Day this year…

Another carelessly thrown together summary here…

Jack Bauer’s Zone of Pain
Athletes call it “being in the zone”. When they reach peak performance and put together an amazing performance as if it were nothing. Think Kobe and his 81 point game, Wilt Chamberlain and his 20,000 women, David Wells pitching a perfect game while drunk.

Then there is Jack Bauer. Yes, he (Bauer) has gone hours without killing people (usually when TylerD liveblogs), yet in the past three hours he has personally added 12 people to The Jack Bauer Kill Counter and he’s just getting started.

The black helicopter came back for a second helping of Bauer and 6 bodies were added to the counter (5 placed there by Jack) last night.

When Jack Bauer gets into his zone, bad people bleed.

TivoBlogging: The Following Took Place Between Midnight and 1:00 am

12:00:00 to 12:11:46

Weaselman nervously paces in the Weaselcave, when the Weaselphone activates. It’s Biff Henderson, calling to conveniently reiterate the plot points covered in the “previously on ‘24′” segment. In a nutshell, the Dept of Homeland Security is concentrating on finding Jack Bauer, but being the DHS, most of their effort is focused on strip-searching 80 year old grandmas and 2 year old girls because they don’t want to be accused of profiling. After pulling up census data on the number of grandmas and toddlers in the Greater LA area, Frau Blucher is concerned that they’ll never find Jack. Then, the HLS Dick got an idea. An awful idea. The HLS Dick had a wonderful, awful idea.

Meanwhile, Jack hands off Shaft to Chiggy. Chiggy breaks left (much as the show will do later on in the all about the oil plot twist)… he’s at the 30… the 20 … the 10…!

Meanwhile, SecDef Hellfeld arrives at the airport to meet his daughter S4GF just as a Police car comes screaming onto the scene. The scenario of Audrey’s figutive boyfriend arriving in a police car is all-to-familiar to Hellfeld, who remembers when she ran with the O-town crips. Jack, S4GF and Hellfeld proceed into the hangar, where Jeff plays the audio from the tape he found of Weaselman confessing. “Does it feel good when I touch you there? It does, doesn’t it? How about there?” “Sorry, wrong track,” Jack says, then plays the actual confession. In response, Hellfeld throat chops him, steals his iPod, and leaves Jack and S4GF handcuffed together. (Which reminds S4GF of the weekend they spent in the Catskills, except Jack had a leather hood.)

Hellfeld doesn’t think exposing Weaselman’s perfidy is the right answer. “He assassinated David Palmer and he gave nerve gas to terrorists. I’m gong to reason with him and expect him to do what’s best for the country.”

12:15:56 to 12:25:52

Anita Hill, wearing a wire, a long silver wire, lies to Chloe. “Frau Blucher and HLS Dick found Audrey’s location. She fell out of the bloomers of an 82 year old Jewish grandmother from Encino while they were strip-searching her. They’ve sent a tac team to her location… which they know… her location.” Chloe falls for the trap and tries to warn S4GF. Frau Blucher and HLS Dick listen in, trace her call to the Van Nuys Airport, and have Chloe arrested by the paleblueshirts.

Frau Blucher calls Weaselman, “Jack Bauer has been found at the Van Nuys Airport.” Weaselman calls Biff Henderson. “Jack Black has been found at the Van Nuys Airport.” Frau Blucher calls Dick Cheney. “Jack Black has been found with a can of nice spare pork.” Dick Cheney calls General Disarray. “Jack Black has round fat cans, and some nice spare pork.” “What the hell are you talking about?” General Disarray asks him. At which point, Dick Cheney becomes confuse and asks Weaselman what’s going on, but Weaselman just asks him to pray with him again, so Dick Cheney goes back to cleaning his hunting rifle.

12:30:04 — 12:36:18

Chloe, in the holding pen, is confronted by HLS Dick. “This situation is more complicated then you realize.” “So, why didn’t you tell me?” “Because you’re an idiot.” “Well, you think the rules don’t apply to you because you’re smarter than we are, but they do, and you’re not.” HLS Dick then proceeds to eat a big red candle. (Okay, new nickname for HLS Dick is Brick Tamlin.) Brick Tamlin turns to leave and Chloe discreetly grabs him and pickpockets his CTU Shoppers Club Card. “Don’t touch me,” Brick Tamlin says, “Nothing gives you that right!” As soon as he is gone, Chloe uses the card to escape… the completely ineffective CTU security system is actually helpful for a change.

12:40:32 — 12:48:13

Mary Todd snuggles up to Red Foreman. “I have to know, what are those dumbasses up to?” Red Foreman tells her, “Meet me by the stables in ten minutes. It’ll be just you, me, and the moon. Wear a tie so I’ll know which one is you.” But when she gets there, all she finds is his cell phone lying on the ground. “The Rapture happened!”

Back in the Weaselcave, Hellfeld corners the Weasel. “Why’d you do it, Chuck?” Hellfeld asks. “For the oil,” Weasel answers. “You better resign, your chair is not a throne.” “Yes, if it were a throne, it would flush.”

Meanwhile, Jack Bauer plots a daring escape. “I saw this on Prison Break,” he says, and proceeds to use a steampipe to melt through his restraints. He then cuts S4GF loose and knocks out the guard with the door.

12:52:24 – 12:59:59

Jack Bauer sticks up the security dude and gets his recording back just as Biff Henderson shows up in a black helicopter and starts shooting up the place. Biff has brought a dozen guys armed with machine guns. Jack has just the pistol he lifted from the guard he knocked out. Within seconds, all of Biff Henderson’s men are shot or incinerated.

But Biff has grabbed S4GF and cut her arm open. “Give me the recording or she bleeds to death,” he snarls. Jack wusses out and gives him the recording. BH leaves in a hail of gunfire to find a car to steal, Jack Bauer stays behind to tourniquet Audrey’s bleeding arm.

Meanwhile, Weasel is mere moments from signing his resignation when Biff Henderson calls. “I’ve got the recording.” Weasel leaps over the desk and waves his palm in front of Hellfeld. “Faced!” He then demands Hellfeld’s resignation and goes to catch the last half hour of Late Night with Conan O’Brien.

24 Live Blog Midnight to 1:00 AM

Good evening boils and ghouls. I’m V the K, and I lost today’s round of naked buck-buck. The LiveBlog is mine.

12:00 It’s Bauer Time. Have we seen Jack eat or go to the bathroom in any of the previous episodes?

12:01 So, on one side, there’s Logan and the Department of Homeland Security searching for Jack. On the other side, Jack + Diet Cola + Chiggy Killer. Um, the Washington Generals had a better chance of beating the Globetrotters.

12:05 Is Heller in a Lockheed Jetstar. Classic! That’s just what Pussy Galore flew in Goldfinger.

12:06 What’s on Jack’s iPod. Elwy and the Tree Weasels, singing the classic hit “Let’s Whack David Palmer.” Secretary Heller —-> Not surprised that Logan is a weasel.

12:09 SMOOCHIES!

12:10 Heller throat chops Jack, takes his iPod, and says he’s going to take down Logan himself, because exposiing his perfidy would rip this country apart. Puh-lease. That’s Hillary Talk.

12:16 Time to play “Spy on Chloe,” a game perfected by Edgar in the bushes outside Chloe’s bedroom window.

12:17 Anita Hill is wearing a wire. I bet it’s small black and curly.

12:18 Chloe’s call is tracked to Van Nuys Airport! The Washington Generals score!

12:22 Now, President Logan claims to be sending the military to get Jack. If he is sending the entire 101st airborne, it might be a fair fight.

12:23 No! Dick Cheney, Never corner a frightened weasel! They can turn on you at any moment!

12:30 Cool. Chloe’s pick-pocket trick with Miles CTU Shopper’s Club card is even better than Matt Broderick’s tape recorder trick in Wargames.

12:31 Oh, no! Stopped in the hallway by Anita Hill. Maybe Chloe can use her awesome people skills to resolve this situation.

12:33 The SecDef drives his own car? Then that must have been Rumsfeld who cut me off on the Beltway this morning! And where does he get a rental at 12:30 at night anyway?

12:40 Now, Heller corners the weasel.

12:41 “Your chair is not a throne.” True, if it was a throne, it would flush.

12:42 Oh, Gawd, the moonbat writers are back. “It’s all about the O-I-I-I-I-I-L!“

12:43 Logan looks like “I wonder if I could tear out his throat with my sharp, needle-like teeth.”

12:44 Mary Todd and Red Foreman’s cell phone? I don’t get it.

12:46 Who’s that guy? I think his name is Bauer. He’s involved in the plot in some way.

12:47 Ah, the old “Melt the handcuffs on a steampipe, then bash the guard’s head in with the door trick.” Classic.

12:51 No, it’s not a Jetstar. It only has single engine pods, not dual pods. Never mind.

12:52 A climatic shootout at the end of the hour? Never saw that coming. I wonder if it will end with a cliffhanger.

12:54 “There’s been too much killing today.” You should know, pal. You did most of it.

12:55 He cut Audrey’s nose! She’ll bleed out in seconds.

12:59 Turns out his chair was a throne, and Heller just got flushed.

If you aren’t “jacked” for tonight’s episode of 24, then you need some serious help. If your politics lean left, the previews talk about Jack Bauer taking down a president. If your politics lean right, it looks like a lot of people will be displaying their second amendment rights tonight.

Will Jack Bauer take down President Logan and possibly another helicopter to boot? Will Audrey get killed off (finally)? Check in to Blogs4Bauer from the hours of 9pm to 10pm for the answers and later for VtheK’s exclusive TIVO blogging.

Blogs4Bauer Challenge - Guess tonight’s Body Count

It could be another banner hour for the Jack Bauer Kill Counter. Make your prediction on how many people will join the kill counter in the comments section below. Last week, Phil guessed 350 kills for Episode 17. Phil, you do know that Jack does not carry around tactical nukes in his manpurse, go easy.

Other
Click Here for the Jack Bauer Kill Counter, click here to vote in the 24: Final Four.

Blogs4Bauer Challenge Results
Episodes 1,2 – 9 Bodies
The Conservative UAW Guy (Guess – 4)
Episodes 3,4 – 14 Bodies
RFTR – 14
Episode 5 – 2 Bodies
AL – 2
Episode 6 – 1 Body
AL – 1
Episode 7 – 5 Bodies
Mr. Bob – 5
Episode 8 – 14 Bodies
Deathlok – 13
Episode 9 – 7 Bodies
RFTR – 7
Episode 10 – 8 Bodies
The Man – 8
Episodes 11, 12 – 59 Bodies
Justin – 27
Episode 13 - 3 Bodies (including Tony)
Justin – 3
Episode 14 - 0 Bodies
Citizen Grim – 3
Episode 15 – 12 Bodies
Al – 11
Episode 16 – 7 Bodies
Shawn – 7
Oxen – 7
Episode 17 – 10 Bodies
Al – 9
Oxen – 9
Dan – 11
Denis E. Ambrose, Jr – 11

Have a safe and happy Passover and Easter Holiday.

Remember to set your clocks, May 9th has been deemed Jack Bauer Appreciation Day by me last season. Do a Yahoo search and you’ll see that it’s catching on, Wiki even has it listed.

How will you spend Jack Bauer Appreciation Day? Post your comments below.

Blogs4Bauer Land

In an effort to capitalize on our popularity before the summer rerun season, the staff at Blogs4Bauer pooled our money together for as new joint venture: Blogs4Bauer Land. Situated in sunny scenic Newark, New Jersey – the only place where we could afford the land – Blogs4Bauer Land is the ultimate in family entertainment. Our most popular attractions include:

Pin the Nose on Audrey with Buckley Williams: You pick the nose! You also pick the placement of the nose, and we don’t even require a blindfold. This object here is as plain (and as large) as the nose on her face.

Who is the Family Leak? Live Torture Supervised by the CUG: Did you ever want to beat your kids with a phone book? How about hooking daddy’s nipples up to a car battery? Well at Who is the Family Leak, now you can! The CUG supplies the implements, and your only limit is your imagination. Not to worry: it is all supervised. (Note: For a substantial fee, the CUG will become lax in supervision.)

Whack a Mole with RFTR: Instead of fluffy mallets, RFTR uses real ball peen hammers for the B4B Whack a Mole. While stalwarts such as Walt Cummings and Nina Myers are present, and the participants change as the particular season dictates. Caution: blood spatter area!

Rick Moran’s Water Park of Death: Rick oversees the wetness in true B4B fashion. The water slide is contaminated with a Centox nerve agent, the wave pool is loaded with real dead bodies (courtesy of Jack Bauer), and the lifeguards are certified by the Chloe O’Brian Rudeness Academy. “No running! I am really busy right now! (Frown)”

The Man’s Guess Your Age, Weight, and Political Affiliation: The Man uses his awesome telekinetic powers to determine the age, weight, and political affiliation of our guests. Our Red Shirt Security will escort those determined to be liberal Democrats out of the park.

Disarm a Real Dirty Bomb with Tyler D: What precocious child has not thought about disarming live explosives? Now their dreams can come true! Tyler D has scoured the Russian breakaway republics to bring you the most authentic dirty bombs the country has ever seen. And remember: cut the blue wire! Or, is it don’t cut the blue wire?

V the K’s Fight Club Octagon: V doles out steaming bowls of justice with his celebrity death matches. Out-of-work actors such as Louis Lombardi and Sarah Clarke actually step inside the Octagon and beat each other senseless. It’s like Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome . . . without Tina Turner.

Wyatt Earp’s Pistol Range: A live-fire shooting gallery for the whole clan. We have everything from AK-47’s to Uzis. And you pick your choice of target, whether it is Habib Marwan, Christopher Henderson, or Ryan Chappelle. Eye and ear protection is provided.

Blogs4Bauer Land: It’s the Violentest Place on Earth!

Putting the “Counter” in Counterterrorism

The Jack Bauer Kill Counter is one of our most innovative creations here at Blogs4Bauer, but I wonder what other incidents could use a B4B counter? Here are a few off the top of my head (which isn’t just a hat rack, ya know):

• The Chloe O’Brian Frown-o-Meter
• The Martha Logan Cleavage Counter
• The Audrey Raines Nose Radar
• The Late Edgar Stiles Twinkie Tally
• The Jack Bauer Spent Shell Casing Chart

Alt-Tab…The Boss is Coming Caption Contest
1) Caption or photoshop this
2) Email photoshop entries to Jack Bauer

Carnival of Bauer!!! VII
The 7th edition of The Carnival of Bauer!!! has been posted at Inn of the Last Home. This week’s carnival has been dubbed The Carnival of Logan in honor of the Weasel-in-chief.

Send Jack Bauer an email if you are interested in hosting The Carnival of Bauer!!! on your site.

Upcoming Hosts
Justin’s Random Thoughts (4/20)
Below the Beltway (4/27)
Right Wing Nation (5/4)
The Llama Butchers (5/11)
The Templar Times

Previous Carnivals
Announcing the Carnival of Bauer!!!
The Carnival of Bauer!!! – Week 1
The Carnival of Edgar- Week 2
The Carnival of Tony – Week 3
The Carnival of Life – Week 4
The Carnival of the Cougar – Week 5
The Carnival of Bauer!!! – Week 6
Make sure to get your entries into next week’s Carnival of Bauer!!! by midnight on Wednesday!

B4B Fight Club: Special Edition: RoboCop Henderson versus Master Chief

RoboCop Henderson: ‘24′
Age: late forties
Nationality: American
Occupation: Traitor
Death Count: Unknown, but probably a lot.
Strengths: Robocop’s armor and weapons combined with Biff Henderson’s unrepentent evil. Snappy catchphrase “Dead or alive, you’re coming with me!”
Weaknesses: Vulnerable to strong electro-magnetic fields
Comment: If he killed Evelyn’s little girl, he needs killing.

Master Chief: ‘Halo’
Age: Twenty-something
Nationality: Reachian
Occupation: Cyborg Super Soldier
Death Count: Um, how many thousands of people were on the first Halo, and on the Covenant Cruiser, and how many did he kill in between?
Strengths: Superhuman strength, regenerating protective force-field, artificial intelligence, proficiency across a wide range of military weapons. Might even stand a chance against Jack.
Weaknesses: You can get around him if you know the shortcuts.
Comment: You think terrorists are bad? Try fighting eight-foot super-lizards with plasma machine guns.

Originally, I was going to do this as Jack Bauer versus Master Chief (inspired by this hilarious, obscene, and definitely NSFW video at YouTube), but I figured it would eventually come down to Chloe hacking into the mainframe and disabling Cortana, leaving Master Chief helpless. So, I decided, hey, Biff Henderson/RoboCop, Cyborg versus Cyborg, that has possibilities.

Counterpoint: Henderson, You’re As Good As Dead!
by The Grim Reaper

Christopher, I for one can truly understand your hatred of Jack Bauer. Hell (no pun intended), hate is one of our “happy places” here. You have no idea how much I wanted to off those slackers Bill and Ted, but sometimes you just have to let things go.

For you see, Jack Bauer is one of my favorite pawns in the battle between Heaven and Hell. On the one hand, that wussy jackass God loves Bauer because of all his “do-goodery.” On the other (and more important) hand, Bauer – like the Marines – kills everything he sees, and keeps Hell packed with fresh souls. Sorry, Chris; Jack Bauer stays.

Oh, and by the way, I HATE Hardees!

Point: I’m Going to Kill Jack Bauer!
by Christopher Henderson

Point: I’m Going to Kill Jack Bauer!
by Christopher Henderson

Jack Bauer has been a pain in the ass for far too long. Someone needs to put a stop to his antics so I can start repairing my marriage. Therefore, I’m going to kill Jack Bauer.

Honey, I know we have had some rough times lately and I really do think with a little physical therapy your limp will hardly be noticeable. Just remember that it was that damn Jack Bauer who shot you just above the kneecap. Trust me, once I finish off Jack Bauer I will explain my actions and why we should find a new mall to shop at. Well, I’ve got to go; Jack Bauer won’t kill himself you know!

Grrr, Jack Bauer! When will people realize that Jack Bauer is a menace and needs to be taken out (for real this time)? With Jack Bauer out of the picture, Miriam and I can take over Los Angeles and rule the city with an iron fist. I can already see a new Los Angeles without Jack Bauer, CTU, and the LA Clippers. There will be Olive Gardens on every street corner and we will rename all the Carl’s Jr restaurants to “Hardees”.

With President Logan, Audrey, and Evelyn’s daughter with me, who can stop us? We’ll succeed where Habib Marwan, Nina Myers, Ramon Salazar, Vladimir Bierko, Max, Joseph Fayed, Sherry Palmer, Ira Gaines, Joseph Wald, Anton Beresch, Stephen Saunders, Marshall Goren, Eddie Grant, Michael Amador, Victor Drazen, Syed Ali, Peter Kingsley, and many others failed. Nothing will stop us. NOTHING! NOTHING!

Counterpoint: Henderson, You’re As Good As Dead!
by The Grim Reaper

Previous Point-Counterpoint Posts
Point- Jack Bauer Cannot Help Recover Your Money, Mr. Rakotozafy (I can) – by Nina Myers
Counterpoint- Everything Nina Myers says is bullsh*t. – by Jack Bauer

Point- Audrey Raines: Kick The Jack Habit Today! – by Dr. Phil (on loan from Match.com)Counterpoint – Audrey, stand by your man! – by Mary Jo Buttafuoco

Point – Thin Mints are an addictive narcotic – by Jack Bauer
Counterpoint – Thin Mints Are Only The Beginning – by Vladimir Bierko

Point – I’m going to make it!
Counterpoint – Nah, you’re not. – by Death

Point – CTU needs better training for their security guards before something bad happens
Counterpoint – My teenage daughter could have stopped every incursion into CTU!

Point- 24:The Game Will Lead to More Violence
Counterpoint – Violence Makes The World Go ‘Round

Point – Jack Bauer could not have shot down one of our AS 350 Ecureuil Helicopters with a handgun
Counterpoint – A redneck with a squirt gun could shoot down your euro-trash.

Point – It’s Time To Turn Jack Bauer Over To The Chinese
Counterpoint – Confucius Say, “Man With Wandering Groin Accomplishes Little”

Point – Impeach Weasel, Dennis Kucinich For President
Counterpoint – Fox should fight off impeachment like Shelley Winters fought off diet cola

Point – They are already illegally wiretapping Jack Bauer’s cell phone, whose next?
Counterpoint – The U.S. government does not violate our civil rights enough!